Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Studies liao. Do what in life?

Another 6-10 months more of studying life, and I'll probably be on the path of working already.

Then, the major questions will be, what will be my job? Will it be interest-related? Will it be IT-related? Will I even get a job? Everyone wants a meaningful job that will interest them and give a meaning to life's journey. Gives memories back to primary school where we had to write an essay with regards to what we wanna be when we grow up. Can't remember what I had wrote, if I did write something, it should be to be a police officer I guess.

Was browsing thru alot of jobs a few days ago.
Just to name a few:

1. Working as a Customer relations officer.
2. Becoming a Teacher.
3. Becoming a financial adviser...
4. Working in the Civil Service..
5. Had the dream of signing on, but alas..
6. Becoming a security auditor.
7. Being involved in IT..marketing.
8. Teach martial arts? lol.
9. Join the workforce as a IT staff.

Thing is, what am I looking for in a job? Self-satisfaction? Interests? Even I can't think of what I wanna be when I graduate.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Blog Patrol rocks...!

I just installed a blog counter on my blog....I got it from kevin's website. Thanks to him for that man. :P

Due to this, I got to know information on whom is visiting my blog and where are they from...feeling curious, since I got some hits from Google.com, I decided to go to Google and type my blog name in....

Guess what? I got 6 hits.

By the way, I'm helping my friend to promote his photo storage creation...it can be accessed from here.

So guys, please give my friend your support...!

Trevor, my Web3D lecturer sent an email to my account to say that the examination results the subject is out. Just hearing this makes me feel so sian...I hope I passed that man...what worries me more is my software fundamentals...its easy, just taxing to finish in one shot...as for my professional practice in information systems, its assured. Phew..now to go zzz and read books.

Night everyone...

And thanks for visiting my blog, Xunru, Alvin and Cindee...

Friday, June 22, 2007

New Picture Site.

Hi my friends who visit my site often...

I've placed a new link to another photo album since the rest are all choked up. Hope you guys love them.


Argh...thinking about my results now....I hope I passed man....

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Holidays are boring..

Just started my semester break not too long ago. Thanks to peishi, I'm now watching the dramas she has passed to me.

Previously I was watching this touching Japanese drama called Gokusen, at first I thought it had something to do with monkey god, but then well, I realized that it was actually something like GTO. I was rather pei chek that it finished after 10 episodes, but was happy to find another 10 in another disc.

But too bad, the first is always the best. As always, the weather is getting really cold, sometimes hitting 6 even. Claus has advised me to wear warm clothing, thanks alot!

Went down to smith street yesterday with pei shi, bought a suit and a hooded jacket, but I still can't find that smart casual jacket that I wanted. I used to wear jackets back in Singapore too, but somehow I found that the matching looked rather bad, so I stopped wearing them, anyway, it turns out that jackets are quite suitable here. So most of the clothes that I'm purchasing here are actually less thicker than they are suppose to be, so that when I go back to Singapore, I can wear them.

Dad told me to call my older follks here and there as they will really appreciate it. Think I should give my grandmas a call tomorrow morning, and also to start getting on with doing my work for the winter.

Things I hope to do:
1. Prep up for subjects next semester.
2. Get started on the recruitment plan.
3. Get started on the website.
4. Start reading the books I have bought so far.
5. Start trying the pasta recipe book that I bought, can cook for my parents when I get back.

I used to think that doing IT would be my preferred field of work. True, it is interesting, but it interests me more during the research factor, but not really in the practical aspect. As for photography, it is my dream to capture memorable images. Cooking? well, I hope to be able to whip up great dishes for the people I love, thats all. I think those who influenced me on these stuff would be:

IT- It should be both Jason and Yi fu.
Photography - It should be my dad and charlie.
Cooking - It should be my aunt's and uncle's food business, and Claus.

Was at a gathering chatting with Irene yesterday. She expressed interested in getting a black belt in aikido. This got me thinking, what does the black belt represent?

To some:
1. It equals to status.
2. It equals to a sense of achievement.
3. It comes about as a sense of higher learning.
4. Time to slack.

I admit that I'm not a top quality aikidoist, therefore I have no right to criticize others. But there are some who are willingly taking up an offer to lend a helping hand without knowing what he or she is getting himself into.

Things to be prepared are:
1. Students who are overzealous.
2. Complain King students.
3. Racist students.
4. Sexist students.
5. Horny students, very rare, but slim chance.

Some trainees might agree that becoming a black belt sacrifices a lot of personal time. Dedication is one thing, personal life is another. Your boyfriend or girlfriend might not understand why are you spending so much time there. You might be swamped by overwhelming demands from students and parents alike.

Well. Thats all for today. :P

Monday, June 18, 2007

Here...fishies...fishies.

Just had a quick dinner with pei shi over at my place today. Cooked some beef and salmon. Hope that she liked what she ate.

I'm out on a fishes craze recently, think due to the exam mood, I literally killed most of my brain cells. She passed me alot of korean dramas to watch...hope they will be interesting. :)

Sleepy...zz

Saturday, June 16, 2007

A cold blurry night.

Melbourne's weather is getting from bad to worse.


The sky was so foggy at 5pm, and by just talking you would be able to see mist coming out of your mouth. Went for aikido after so long finally at Melbourne University. Seems rather funny that I'm going to another school's aikido class instead of my own. Well, I had exams that period of time, what to do?

I saw a set of Melbourne university's polar fleece jacket. Wow it was really nice, not to say that the one made by RMIT University sucks, but the former was definitely the type of jacket that I preferred. I really liked the beanie sold by RMIT though.

Went dinner with peishi at Nandos. One thing about this restaurant is that I'm only attracts to the chilli sauce. Brr...Cold weather.
Too bad I can't post pics here, will update it in when able to.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Finally over.

Yippee.

My exams are finally over. But I still do not know what I wanna do for the holidays. Feel so tired after the exams.

Time for a long rest. Haiz.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Alternate World.

Was planning to write this in the morning, but somehow got overtaken by the other's thoughts.

Ever get the feeling that when you are sleeping, you have a dream that makes you smile, and just when you get to the good part, you wake up. An absolute letdown. You start to grumble about not finishing the dream. I had this idea when I was a kid. If you wanna continue your dream, just go back to sleep and you know what? It works.

How? You might ask. Well, There's different levels of sleep. When dreams start occurring, you are at the level where you are physically asleep, but you are still mentally conscious. Make yourself go back to that level. I have been doing this since I was a kid.

Some people may ask, what the point of this? Simple, in a dream, you came from:

Asleep --> Unconscious --> Conscious mode --> Awake.
(You have no or little control of what you are dreaming.)

I tried this method.
Awake-->Asleep-->Conscious.
(You have complete control over your dreams, and you can wake up anytime you want.)

Simply saying, I love this world. I allows me to live in this false reality where I can achieve my impossible dreams just for a temporary period of time. I get to relive my memories again, inputing parts that were missing in real life, thus turning it into reel life. Sometimes I do wish I could just sleep on and continue living in this alternate reality. But yet the reality beckons.

At the start, there were some miscalculations on my side. There was once, I woke up, went back to dreamland, but only woke up at the end of 4 days. The other times were that I went into conscious mode without physically sleeping, therefore seeing some stuff that one would normally describe as a nightmare, but the problem was that I was experiencing the nightmare while awake!

The mind is such a fun place.

Just Desserts.

Just wanna write something about myself. Something that a lot of people don't know about mi.

I find it very interesting to see if a friend has been cause the of problems for me. Especially if its a long term problem. Its rather an interest booster to the person's character, I must comment.

Childishness?

Most of the time, even if I know that you are the troublemaker behind my problem, Nah, I still won't bother, unless you start to make the first move to bomb me. But then I'll still be a friend and visit you occasionally, even if you don't want to open the door. Well, I believe in a lasting friendship.

But I also believe what goes around, comes around.
Sins were much discussed about in my religion. Really paid a lot of attention on this. Friend should be friends, true. I'll still be friendly to you even if you were stabbing my back. I believe in basic conscience. If the friend in question doesn't have it, thats ' even better, coz this makes life's journey much more interesting in the number of surprises that you will get from this guy. Life is pretty much more interesting with the bad guys around, don't you think?

Anyway, the point is, I believe, when you grow old and die, we will either go to Purgatory, Heaven or Hell. I think most of the people that die are still somewhere in purgatory, waiting for their sins to be forgiven. I wouldn't want my friend to go to hell or purgatory you know.

The best result: I'll see you guys in heaven. We will talk about the good, funny times, we enjoy the company of the creator.
The worst result : I'll see you guys in hell. I will just ask you, "Mate, how's the heat? It's hot in here, I know I deserved this, but what are you doing here with me? my good friend?"

The 'okay' result: We see each other in purgatory. One of us will take a longer time to be condemned, or be enlightened.

Anyway. Enuff of this. The main point is: I love you my friend. To me, giving is like a double-edged sword. I'll give you what I have, you deserved it. I want you to turn back and stop stabbing me, simply cuz it hurts. But if you still decide to stab on, so be it. But the thing is, up till here, anything else that I give you will accumulate your sins, cause you are repaying evil for friendship. In a way, I'm giving you an extra serving of sins. The idea is, if you are still stabbing me, you better stop accepting stuff from me. :P

I am the type who's going to absolutely anything to repay the deeds done to me.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Skincare Siao.

Australia really has a lot of facial products for Men.

Could it be because of the queers too? Anyway, if it is so, then I thank them, since I use just as much as a girl anyway.

Some people reading my blog might be curious, why am I writing this..?

Well, last time back in secondary school, I used to have damn alot of pimples, outbreaks etc. My whole face was so red with acne lor. Then I started to use facial wash, scrub etc. But the ones that I use in Singapore cannot be found here. Haiz...going to have some problem removing blackheads man.

I just discovered a new product. It helps to sooth off the dark eye circles around the eyes and the eye bags. And whaddayaknow, it works!

too bad I can't post pictures directly onto the blog, but it will look kinda gay-ish. Just finish my 1st paper, and my first exam in so long. What was the last test I took in Singapore?

Oh yah, the SOP for the use of MOPPE4. Heh. Wear the stupid chemical defense suit. Most of my friends are going back sg, wonder when are they coming back. One more thing, I have to thank 36th SCE for this nice jacket. Keeping me protected from the COLD. Thou I wish someone can get my Gortex jacket for me :(

I'm so happy that I am no longer owning anything to that bastard staying upstairs. You think its a personal pleasure to pick people off? I didn't do anything to you, and what you do? Go around telling others not to befriend me, telling tales behind my back. Fuck you. I regret even coming to Melbourne together with you in the first place. For placing my trust in someone so utterly unreliable. Nabei, telling me that you can't contact me at all, my phone is on 24 hours. I'm online until late at night, you can't contact me. You get pissed with me for that, that how about the times I was looking for you?

1. Spreading rumors that I'm visiting pros. (What's your problem? You need someone to go with you?)
2. Telling people I'm bad company("At least I'm not like someone who degrades people of other races in public")
3. Telling me that you are not at home thru the phone.(But I'm at your neighbor's place and whose voice am I hearing..?)
4. Telling me to wait for u to come down to print until 2am, but where the hell are you?
5. Then telling me days later that you don't want to print already then. What do you take me for? Your servant?

6.I chose not to believe what others were saying about you mate, but seems like I was wrong!

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Material ways...getting bits outta my heart!

Juz feel like blogging today before my 1st paper on Friday.


Beginning to see the sense in things..why was I so silly then to pursue something that comes by fate...? Being single is great. There's no one to look back for. I'm my own guy, I walk my own path, there's no need to stretch my hand out waiting for someone to come grasp my hand.

Realize so much things in life is so much of material gains. You work, you slog....whats the point? Others would say its to fulfill their dreams. Some would say its to give their family a good life. Happy family is the game. But think of it, all the time spent slogging your time off. Can you ever earn back what you have missed in your life amid all those years of slogging?

I don't like slogggin' cuz the idea's simple. I work so hard, I look back. I can see the happy times of people around me, but I'm not in the picture. After so long, there has only been one person who really cared about what I think, cared to know me better. Cared to know more about me..while all the while, I'm the one doing all the work, trying to find out things my friends love. Try to match those single friends with other single friends I have that are around the type of that both of them are looking for. Discreetly. I wanna see something blossom in my world.

I was really happy today when I saw that Adelin was getting engaged. And to none other then my great friend. Daniel. So many of my friends are already married. Ke Bin to his wife in the States. Weiwen and her husband on the 1st of June. Huiyi to her boyfriend in Sept. Yeah I'm not there.

Family comes First. Work Second.

Relationships have never really been much of a thing for me, when I look deep into my heart. I wanna be there for the person I love. But I'm always taken for granted. After awhile, I feel like I'm out of the picture...Juz there but not there. If I get to choose, I might want to apply for the position of a guardian angel, since I'm always there, but no one really knows I'm there. I wanna be the one who wraps my wings around someone I care about, to shelter her from the rain or the glaring sun. But when she feels something, She looks back and realized I'm gone.

I feel like this world is really an illusion. Happiness? Define it. How does one find it? How do you define your happiness? I'm defining my happiness in showing the people around me that I love them. What's the 1st thing I'm gonna do when I grad? I'm gonna give my dad , my grandma and my mum a kiss and a hug, and tell them how much I love them, not because I miss them, but more to knowing I should start treasuring those around me more. Then I'll hug my sister and brother, cuz to me I've always seen them as little tots in my eyes since I'm the oldest, and there's none else whom I care more for.

As for a girlfriend. We will wait for it. Was watching this show called Click. When it came to this touching scene of the dad who wasted all his time on work 1st, family last. Came the time when the angel of death claims him, he realized the time he has wasted but it was too late. I used to get the sad feeling, start sobbing and think of my grandfather. I was in school at the time he passed away. I wasn't even there to bid him goodbye.

I was too late. I'm sorry.

When I wanted to ask Cindy something.

I was late. I'm sorry for making you wait that time.

But now when I watch the show, I get this double feeling. the left side of my tells me he deserve it for wasting so much precious time. The right side of me laments for the poor soul. The result? A headache due to conflicting feedback at the same time.

I don't wish to be too late again.

I treated Yang yang to dinner at Cafe Nocturno 2 days ago. Convinced her that Italian food was great. But then when she started eating, I saw a striking resemblance to my 1st girlfriend. People say the 1st love hurts the most. But I tell you this, its also where u love the most. Both "love" to cover their face up, both are so damn shy. It's not lovable, but more to irritating type of covering. You don't listen to what others have to say. Cancerians. I've been hurt enough by them.

"I like you. Do you like me? Well, I like another guy. But I could try loving you."
"I don't think we can be together, I still prefer the other guy, let's break up. Be friends? Ok."
"U feeling down? I promised I'll be there for you, so here I am."
"I think I'm starting to like you now."
"Oh Ok. But I've given up on you."
("I'm not there for you because you need help. I was there for you because I thought you had decided to give us the chance to be together again, but alas, when you told me that you are beginning to like me, I knew it was just another cycle. I could just be dropped again when another cute guy drops by, or u think that you have the chance with the other guy. " I'm just disappointed that through the times spent when you were down, I was just another guy to u.)

My neighbor was telling me that she thinks that I'm a romantic dude. So I asked her why. She comments that I have the chocolates, cherries etc; stuff in my room to show. So I just nodded. But well...I think that currently I'm still too sick to go think about a female companion like what my grandma suggested. She highlighted not to look for any angmohs, hongkongers or cantonese girls. Think it must be the number of pics I took with guys that I sent to my dad, and my dad showed her.